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Humiliation & degradation - luago
#1
Most of the people I've met so far are nice and being an old grad I appreciate that it might be a valid concern about how I'll fare at a residency program at my age! Having said so, in one of the interviews, I felt like I was invited only to be insulted! Questions asked to me were, how old are you? How will you keep up with these kids? These kids are born in the 'right part of the world'!! Suggesting I wasn't!! Then she quickly corrected herself saying in her very thick accent, I was born in the wrong part of the world as well!! She wasn't!! Everybody in the program including herself was either a kaplan, or a goldman or a scholl!!! Finally when one commented sarcastically, I feel energized to meet people younger than me; now tell me what have you been for all these years? I have had enough! He was in his sixties!! I immediately said, I feel humbled to meet people older than me because it reminds me of mortality of human nature!! Man, he was seething in fury!!! I'll never match there!! But I had my pound of flesh form tribe of Shylocks!!
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#2
i am sorry to hear this...i wud rather not to return insult with insult...it is hard and needs a lot of encouragement to think/behave this way....but being an img....and getting all those shit u r sayingm has made me to try to change myself ....rather to expect ppl to change...i have learned no matte how much i returned evil with evil...it made the situation like a hell for me!!! that is why now i am trying to change and to try to stay + and to receive the shit as a challenge to raise up higher and to become a mature person! well, finally fighting with them and fighting them back didnt work at all!!! that is my 2 cent advise for myself and u if u dont mind! we have paid a lot and now we need to do our best to reach our goals!!! it cud be that they wanted to try u and test u as an old img...to see how much u/i r amenable and flexible...how much u and i can tolerate shit that may happen anyways. Remember that they want strong amenable candidates who can manage even the shit….not versus! I think this was one of the reason I matched ….and I/we need to try the same to ace it! Finally we are not doing this for them…but for ourselves to grow up,to have a better future and to manage anything in our life and carrier/residency! I hope u don’t mind me sharing this here. gl
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#3
you're right john, but only if one can take 4 years of the same BS. And believe me, there is a LOT more BS during residency than during the IV. the IV is the nice face of a program.
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#4
God Bless your guts!! lol!
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#5
luago,

I am a fresh grad but an older applicant...I was too asked similar question. In fact one PD asked me exactly same questions that you were asked. I kept my cool and answered her very calmly but methodically. I answered all the questions in great details..after so much confrontation and almost humiliation, the PD told me that she went through the same things herself....went to med school late...all personal problems...financial difficulties...then I realized that she was asking them b/c she had all of them herself. I was amazed an d shocked to hear what she had to say.
I sent her a thank you email later that nite..she replied to me right away stating that she was very impressed with my interview.

So we may never know why they are confronting us that way...but please dont loose your cool when you are at interview...think that it is a hurdle before the residency that you have go through...of course during the residencies we have to go through much more s*&*t too...

My suggestion to you would be to be patient and calm....after all you know that this journey will not be that easy. dont take it personally...they are charging you to see how thick your skin is...you need to be thicker dear..

be good..

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#6
Hi Luago !
Well, I know what you have been through, I'm also a old grad, very old, well according to the system, but I feel like a kiddo still, well on every iv I have been so far, I always have been the senior among all the candidates, so far I have gone to 3 iv's in Chicago, NM and NY, and well, some interviewers are kind and supportive, most are challanging you if you are going to adapt to the young residents and if you are going to be able to take orders from younger ones, and less experienced residents. And when they have tried to be sarcastic about it, I just play along and even throw a joke about myself and they even laugh about it and they have even soften the interview and questioning. The last two interviewers even ended up saying something like, well hope I can learn something from you., and both just laugh about it.
I have another 3 IV to do, so its better to let your years on the field take over and play the game, and things will be just fine, at the end if there is a place for us, we will be joining the same game as young folks, but with the maturity to take BS.
Old grads still can play this game !!!
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#7
@fowley well written!
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#8
awesome hints here!!!!! yuoopp...it takes maturity to take all the BS which come our way anyways....and they like the mature candidates who can take it the best! u have no ideas how i am tryin to deal with the BS while in residency!! talking them back is not a mature way to me and as of my expo...not that i am a mature person....but i felt frustrated and tired of the shit and to try to correct those or to fight back....hopefully, a mentor took my attention and advised me to grow up and to try to focus on the higher goals/GOD in my life when i face the BS!! it is helping me a lot!! it is making me to be a better person and to at least not to waste my energy to find a shit to return the BS the same way!! i try to stay calm, take a pause and even try to thank them for the shit!!! belive or not, when i do this,....they are less likely to play around like a jerk!!! finally, when we get our license we can move forward and start working somewhere else! try to focus on ur goal...some may consider god....family....and find the best way to manage it...even the BS! there are pts who dont like fmgs and piss us off in front of the attending by misinfo! wht abt that? there are more challenges in front, all we need is to find a way to relax and to handle it with a good attitude and maturity. gl to all
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#9
Thanks for kind words! Why do I still complain about the world being unfair even at my age?
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#10
"Why do I still complain about the world being unfair even at my age?"

because you are a human being too..
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